ATTN:  Ms. Scarlett, Ms. Peacock, Mrs. White, Mr. Green, Prof. Plum, Cnl. Mustard, Mr. Boddy, Mr. Wadsworth, and Guests.

Your presence is required on the (hopefully not stormy) evening of SATURDAY, October 31st at WILDE Bar and Restaurant (3130 N Broadway) at precisely 4:30pm.   If someone’s car breaks down, please rely on Professor Plum to lecherously offer you a ride.  Arrive one at a time, in pairs, or in groups.  But do NOT be late so as to avoid fates similar to the singing telegram girl.   Reserved for your dining pleasure is the entire library and study area…  where you will perhaps be served one of Mrs. White’s favorite dishes.  Following dinner, a costume parade spectacle of extremely gay proportions will proceed down Broadway for your viewing pleasure… and I do hope that in all the chaos, there are no casualties involving candlesticks or ropes.   See you all there!

Sincerely,

ANONYMOUS

(Pseudonyms used, with full confidentiality, to protect the identities of the invitees.)