Tyler Coates

Embarrassing story: the other night Andrew and I were drinkin’ and smokin’ in the backyard at his friend’s place in Chelsea. I had joked about my cabaret set list, which included such classic songs as “What Did I Have That I Don’t Have,” “Heaven on Their Minds,” and “Somewhere That’s Green.” I started with the dialogue to this song, all from memory, and even Andrew was impressed. Then I went into it. Belting! And then I heard the sound of a window being angrily thrown open, and then some unknown old gay man yelled, “Can you quiet it down or take it inside?” So, basically, I’ve already bombed in Chelsea.